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Contemporary Literature

Before I Go by Colleen Oakley

By Colleen Oakley

At the eve of what was once speculated to be a effective “Cancerversary” along with her husband Jack to have a good time 3 years of being cancer-free, Daisy suffers a devastating blow: her general practitioner tells her that the melanoma is again, yet this time it’s an competitive degree 4 prognosis. She could have as few as 4 months left to stay. dying is a daunting prospect—but no longer simply because she’s afraid for herself. She’s petrified of what's going to ensue to her marvelous yet differently charmingly helpless husband whilst she’s not there to keep up him. It’s this worry that retains her up at evening, until eventually she stumbles at the answer: she has to discover him one other wife.

With a unique choice, Daisy scouts neighborhood parks and occasional outlets and on-line courting websites trying to find Jack’s excellent fit. however the additional she will get on her quest, the extra she questions the sanity of her plan. because the considered her husband with one other lady turns into all too genuine, Daisy’s pressured to come to a decision what’s extra vital within the brief period of time she has left: her husband’s happiness—or her personal?

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Wild boar steamed in myrtle leaves. {20 Someone having a birthday, ‘‘Tanti auguri a te,’’ the words rising in the piazza— And suddenly the light, that light. The sanctuary with its silver offering bowls, the lepers singing. Here are the goblets filled with wine. The smell of sunlight fading from the stones. Quietness that’s solitude but not isolation. And the windows lit with displays of red corals from just off the coast said to be the blood that streamed from Medusa’s severed neck when Perseus laid her head beside the sea.

I answer: Radiance will change its name. In the heat I squirm and shrug out of my summer suit and breathless split into a cotton dress. It is almost evening. There are fireflies. On the lawn of my childhood house, an operating table, doctors, a patient under a sheet. I walk up. Under the webbing of IVs, a surgeon hands me a silver comb and I start brushing the patient’s hair like I did my mother’s when I was a girl. The nurse lifts the sheet. It isn’t my mother. It’s the monkey. I bend my ear to its dying lips and it says: You haven’t much time— risk it all.

This is what I realized that night in that divided city. After playing the wretched hostel piano, I wrote: Dear N, I want to cut off my hair and tie it into brushes so I can paint the city of Belfast in its true humanity. All day long I passed an artist’s studio where the clay arms and hands of women were displayed in the window. Small hands to hold such a city. Love, K {24 grandfather outside There are sadnesses which cast in one’s soul the shadows of monasteries. —E. M. Cioran We arrived too late for the sundial.

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